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Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar.

No argument here. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that's why I'm transferring to business school! Leela's gonna kill me. That could be 'my' beautiful soul sitting naked on a couch. If I could just learn to play this stupid thing.

You, a bobsleder!? That I'd like to see! I'll get my kit! I don't 'need' to drink. I can quit anytime I want! You can see how I lived before I met you. I love this planet! I've got wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring.

Say it in Russian!

We can't compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral! Who are you, my warranty?! No. We're on the top. But existing is basically all I do! Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar.

  1. And from now on you're all named Bender Jr.
  2. There's no part of that sentence I didn't like!
  3. Morbo can't understand his teleprompter because he forgot how you say that letter that's shaped like a man wearing a hat.

Fry! Quit doing the right thing, you jerk!

Yes! In your face, Gandhi! And I'd do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it. You, a bobsleder!? That I'd like to see! I'm Santa Claus! It's okay, Bender. I like cooking too. That's right, baby. I ain't your loverboy Flexo, the guy you love so much. You even love anyone pretending to be him!

  • But existing is basically all I do!
  • You can crush me but you can't crush my spirit!
  • Robot 1-X, save my friends! And Zoidberg!

For example, if you killed your grandfather, you'd cease to exist! Professor, make a woman out of me. This is the worst part. The calm before the battle. What are their names? Hey, what kinda party is this? There's no booze and only one hooker.

We'll need to have a look inside you with this camera. Pansy. I've got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I'm going to the bathroom like clockwork, every three hours. And those jerks at Social Security stopped sending me checks. Now 'I'' have to pay ''them'!

Aww, it's true. I've been hiding it for so long. Shut up and get to the point! Oh yeah, good luck with that. Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems. I'm sorry, guys. I never meant to hurt you. Just to destroy everything you ever believed in.

Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools. Or a guy who burns down a bar for the insurance money! There's one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain! Fry! Stay back! He's too powerful!

Alright, let's mafia things up a bit. Joey, burn down the ship. Clamps, burn down the crew. The key to victory is discipline, and that means a well made bed. You will practice until you can make your bed in your sleep.

Yes, if you make it look like an electrical fire. When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all. I found what I need. And it's not friends, it's things. I videotape every customer that comes in here, so that I may blackmail them later.

Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun! Dr. Zoidberg, that doesn't make sense. But, okay! I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself. Yeah, lots of people did. Bender, this is Fry's decision… and he made it wrong. So it's time for us to interfere in his life.

One hundred dollars. And remember, don't do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don't not do it! Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.

Look, everyone wants to be like Germany, but do we really have the pure strength of 'will'? I didn't ask for a completely reasonable excuse! I asked you to get busy! So, how 'bout them Knicks? Bender! Ship! Stop bickering or I'm going to come back there and change your opinions manually!

I was all of history's great robot actors - Acting Unit 0.8; Thespomat; David Duchovny! You lived before you met me?! It doesn't look so shiny to me. For example, if you killed your grandfather, you'd cease to exist!

In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. Why did you bring us here? Check it out, y'all. Everyone who was invited is here. I suppose I could part with 'one' and still be feared…